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Monday 26 October 2020
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BEN AFFLECK’S BEST ACTING BEARD ESCAPES

BEN AFFLECK’S BEST ACTING BEARD ESCAPES

BOSTON – Today Ben Affleck tearfully told reporters that his best acting beard used in Argo and at the end of The Town has escaped.
The Beard made a bid for freedom while Ben Affleck had hung it out to dry having washed it in a preparation of high tension honey and ham juice. ‘It’s what gives it that special sheen,’ the dumb one from Good Will Hunting (as he prefers to be known) said. ‘I had that beard from when it was a mere ‘tash when I was in Shakespeare in Love.’
Mr. Affleck’s new film Argo has been praised for its excellent beard-age and was in line to win recognition from the Academy, with some even proposing that the beard should get a separate category.
‘That performance is 16% Affleck and 97% beard,’ said John J. Mackaloid of the Association of Numeracy Illiterates.
A reward of $27 has been offered for anyone with information leading to the recovery of the beard.

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