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Monday 21 August 2017
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ADELE: ‘PEOPLE VIDEO MY CONCERTS GET HANDS CHOPPED OFF’

ADELE: ‘PEOPLE VIDEO MY CONCERTS GET HANDS CHOPPED OFF’

HOLLYWOOD – Pop star Adele has promised that she will chop off the hands of anyone who she finds videoing her concerts on their mobile devices.

Everyone knows that Rolling in the Deep singer Adele doesn’t like people videoing her concerts but now it seems she is willing to go a little further in discouraging her fans from ‘not being in the moment’. Issuing a press release earlier today, the pop diva had this to say:

I want people to enjoy my music. I want them to come to my concerts and actually be there. Be mindful of the now. And so I have hired a security firm from Mexico and if they catch you filming my performance at my concert then they will take the offending limb.

Although radical, hand amputation is nothing new in the world of pop. Rock journalist Hampton Basheer told the Studio Exec:

This is a swing back to the Eighties when video cameras first began to appear. Freddie Mercury was dead against it and so Queen had a bunch of men with machetes watching the crowd. I remember going backstage once and finding this pile of arms right next to the cocaine. It was most upsetting, but it worked. No one saw a Queen concert except via the official Queen films.

Adele will be touring throughout 2016.

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